6 approaches to Be More Feminine: Awaken the Tenderness Inside You

You know how I’m always encouraging (ok nagging) you to be more feminine when you are with men?

The female, womanly part is inside all of us, but most often it’s locked away under a veil of ‘I take care of myself. I’m strong and invulnerable.

And yes, all of that is true, but leading with it can put-off good men.

Your softness, your femininity is https://topadultreview.com/instanthookups-review/ THE thing that attracts grownup, fabulous men like bees to freaking honey. And, more importantly, it makes you feel like a whole person.

Yet it’s the one thing we often hold back.

Don’t Save Your Feminine Side for ‘Later

We don’t really do it knowingly. This holding back has become a device we use to protect us from all the evils those bad men can bestow on us. Rejection, lying, cheating and worse – as women dating in our 40s, 50s and beyond, we’ve seen lot to make us wary.

So we keep the sensitive, compassionate, soft side of ourselves covered up with bravado, hard work, and an ‘ I don’t need no stinking man veneer.

Maybe you think that once you trust him or once he scales the wall you put up to protect yourself, then you will gladly be more feminine and let him have that yummy, sexy, sweet part of your gorgeous self.

Well, there’s catch, sister! If you’re waiting for him to do all that first, you’re probably going to be waiting a damn long time. As the substantial, masculine good guys – the ones who want to love, adore, defend and protect you – those guys likely won’t give you more than a second date. ( If you get a date at all.) They don’t waste their time climbing walls.

Your Femininity is Your Power

So…not feeling your feminine much? Look, your juicy woman is in there, she’s just been hiding after all these years of being the one who has to take care of all the business in your lifetime.

I’m here to help you reconnect with that juicy woman, because it is HER you want to bring on your dates, and just be in the entire world!

Yes, being more feminine means being more open with your feelings and expressions, and with that comes some vulnerability. But know that this is your strength! Not just because it draws the right men, but because it’s FUN! It’s the only way you will get to experience the real man-to-woman relationship that you want and deserve.

VIEW HERE to learnYOUR FEMITYPE!

Lead with Tenderness on the First Date

Here are 6 tangible actions you can take to begin reconnecting with your warm, open feminine self. She is in there…you just need to be reacquainted.

• Wear color ( not black or beige).

  You will stand out and when you look at your reflection you will see yourself as happier, more expressive, emotional and creative. So will he. Trust me on this.

• Smile.

  Smile at yourself in the mirror for at least 30 seconds before you leave the house or your car. Even if it feels freakish, do it. Science has shown that even fake smiling (especially when done in a mirror) creates positive, warm, happy feelings. It lowers your blood pressure and decreases stress. Yes, just the act of turning up your mouth does that. Amazing!

• Appreciate yourself.

  While looking at yourself in the mirror find three things you love about yourself. No negative self-talk allowed! Say what you love out loud, as if you were complimenting your best friend. Then, maybe create a list of what you love about yourself on your mobile phone so you can carry it with you wherever you go.

• Receive graciously.

  After you compliment yourself, thank yourself for the compliment. Being able to receive graciously is a confident, feminine trait that is an absolute must if you want to attract and spend your daily life by having a giving, kind, loving man. Then, go out and practice!Ask for a little help from two men today – and for the next five days. Ask for something like directions, help carrying something or his opinion. Once he obliges, give him a simple ‘thank you and a smile. Watch his reaction and pay attention to how it feels for you to receive. (I bet you want it!)

• Wear sexy undergarments.

  No, this isn’t about caving to men’s horny desires. Even if no man is going to see them (yet), you’ll feel sexier and more feminine knowing your lady parts are adorned in beauty and luxury.

• Start concentrating on your feelings ( not just your thoughts).

  Are you nervous, excited, tired, hopeful, worried, happy? Write them down…just be aware.Why is this important? Because most men need a woman’s help in order to access their feelings. So they look for the woman with whom they feel safe. Being in touch with your feelings and being able to express them will shift your whole experience with men.You will move from purely intellectual connections to ones with more emotion and meaning. This gives you important information about him and a potential relationship. It moves things forward and will keep you out of the dreaded friend-zone.

Awareness of Your Deepest Feelings is the Key

The coaching I’m giving you here will 100% surely help you be more feminine and attract much better quality men. But that’s not totally all. This will help you truly and deeply feel the power of your feminine self! It’s not almost him. Embracing her is your own gift!

Follow these steps and start on the path to be more of the nurturing, kind, open, warm woman you might be. Do it for yourself and for him. Doesn’t it feel good to be more feminine? I’d LOVE to hear how these exercises feel for you. Or your ideas to simply help us feel more yummy as a woman. Leave me a comment and let me know!!

Another Father’s Day without my Dad, who left us in 2012.

He was a good man, my Pop. His last several years were difficult, filled with numerous medical issues and a wife who was unable to deal kindly with his physical and emotional challenges.

So when Dad left, I was happy for him.

I imagine he is now responsibility and nagging free, enjoying himself by having a Stoli over ice in one hand and a handy remote control in the other, watching me live my life filled with love and meaning…and being over-the-moon happy for me. I know he’s proud of me and that means everything.

While some judged how my Dad lived his life after retirement − he didn’t play golf, take classes or volunteer − I understood. My Dad did his job in this life, and he did it well. He was a typical man of the 50s who focused the majority of his life on his responsibilities.

During the first half of his grownup life, Dad took care of my shopaholic, narcissistic Mother, my brother and myself. And the second half of his life he took care of his new wife, with whom he spent 20+ happy years. In his late 7os Dad got very sick, and started a downhill spiral. Sadly, his life was pretty crappy after that.

Below is an article I typed soon after Dad’s passing. I wanted to express who he was and how much I appreciated this smart, fair, caring man with the integrity you wish you’d see in every person you meet. I think you’ll love him as much as I do.

I miss you so much Dad. Happy Father’s Day.

PS: I’d love to hear about your Dad. And love to all you Dads out there!

My Dad died. There…I said it out loud. Even though I was by his side and saw him take his very last breath, it’s been hard to believe he’s gone forever. F-o-r-e-v-e-r.

I wanted to write this article for Thanksgiving so I could publicly thank him and show my gratitude. How trite, I thought. It doesn’t do him justice.

So I write now. On a dreary Friday in November. Just another day like every single day since October 2 when I think of him and wish he were here.

I very much desire to honor this honorable man. I also desire to pass on some of his life tips. I know he would get a kick out of me doing this. Not just because receiving public gratitude is pretty nice, but because it validates that he did an excellent job teaching me. (Yes… I was listening, Dad!)

I now see that Melvin took his job as Father very seriously. He made a good living. He set a strong and positive example. He taught us something every day. He raised two hard-working, nice people.

I also see that he loved me deeply. I never fully realized that until the last several years of his life.

My Dad was a typical man of the 50s and showing emotion was like speaking a language he never learned. As a side effects of his strokes, though, Dad became less able to control his emotions. He started telling me he was proud of me. He told me he loved me. And as he did, he would choke up and even cry.

Dad also showed a huge amount of love and appreciation for the man I picked to marry.

By the time I got married at 47, Dad had given up on the idea of me ever snagging a man.

He stopped asking what was ‘going on. My wedding fund have been dissolved into another account. He worried (in certain cases out loud) that I’d never have anyone to take care of me.

That always really pissed me off. I knew my Dad thought I wasn’t whole with out a husband. He also thought that I couldn’t attract one because I was doing something very wrong.

After he received the news of my upcoming nuptials, dear Dad told my brother ‘I hope she doesn’t screw this one up! After my brother told me that ( which was a stupid thing only a man would do) I was mad at my Dad for at least a year.

( As an aside, when I first talked to my Dad about my wedding here’s what he said: it is possible to wear white, honey. Don’t worry… I won’t tell anybody. That was the delightful, funny side of my Dad!)

Almost the time Melvin was due to walk me down the aisle, now that I was sharing my life with an amazing man, I started to get it. My Pops was scared for me. He knew life was hard. (See below.) He wanted me to be happy, and knew how much having a good partner would enrich my life. He didn’t want me to have to face every event, every decision and every success in my life with out a #1 fan.

At 47 I learned that my Dad was still smarter than me. Even though he was living circa Father Knows Best times, he knew something I didn’t know. Life is better with a partner who makes you feel safe and special and, yes, taken care of.

Unfortunately it took his death to simply help me realize something super significant about my Dad: he was the man he wanted to be. Though there were many ways he ticked me off and disappointed me, Dad achieved exactly what he set out to do in life: be a good Father.

Just like in the movies, when Dad knew his time with us was nearing an end, he called Larry over and whispered in his ear. He asked him to promise to take care of me. I didn’t feel one twinge of anger; only gratitude and love.

My Dad was simply doing his job.

So…here are just a few of the things I learned from my Dad. You probably know many, but perhaps one or two will help calibrate your daily life compass as they do for me every day.

• Use soap.
• Turn off the lights.
• Don’t pet stray dogs.
• Don’t change lanes in an intersection.
• There is absolutely no free lunch.
• Good neighbors can be found in all colors.
• Don’t work on Yom Kippur.
• Life is hard.
• Keep your word.
• Matzo Brei is best with sugar.
• Close the cupboard doors.
• Don’t sweat the small stuff. (The only advice he gave Larry and me before our wedding.)
• Sarcasm is an undervalued form of communication.
• Always refill the tray if you take the last ice cube.
• Your integrity is everything.
• Regardless of what someone does for a living, if they work hard they deserve respect.
• Work for justice.
• You will get what you pay for.
• There are many people suffering and you can’t ignore them.
• Respect is earned.
• Work hard and you will be rewarded.
• Be fair.
• Be kind.
• Be grateful.
• Take care of people you love.
• Do your best.

And maybe the best lesson he taught me, which I almost learned too late: I am loved.

Rest in peace, Pops. I favor you too.